THE ROBERT W. WHITAKER ARCHIVE

NOW WHO ARE THE REAL BIRDBRAINS? | 2005-02-19

Do you notice how, as usual, my entire life has been devoted to over-explaining what any sane person should see as basic to a healthy mind?

Most of our right-wingers tend to see the world in exactly the same way Women's Libbers do.

I am NOT criticizing them. Liberals see the world in exactly the same way, only sicker.

Look, gang, think about peacocks. The male peacock has to grow and constantly preen this huge fan of useless feathers. He has to fight to claim his strutting ground.

Meanwhile, what are the females doing?

They are standing there quietly judging which one of these fighters and strutters wins the only prize that matters.

Women's Libbers say the male peacocks are using the female peacocks. Male peacocks get to do all the strutting, so they are putting female peacocks in a humiliating, subservient position.

According to Women's Libbers, peacock nature puts the female in a humiliating position. The Women's Libbers say women should be out there on the strutting ground, sticking on feathers and strutting.

Do you have any idea how a healthy-minded female peacock would react to that?

A healthy-minded female peacock would react to a female peacock who wants to get out on the strutting ground exactly the same way a South Carolina redneck would react to a guy in San Francisco who feels he has a right to put on makeup and walk around in high heels.

By some strange coincidence, NOW is crammed full of lesbians.

What a surprise.

So who is using whom? There's no point to all those multicolored feathers and all that fighting for a strutting ground if the females don't like it. From one end of nature to the other, we males are battling for power and territory while the females are doing the choosing.

We are USING them.

Yes, I use the hell out of my anchor.

And her response is, "Sure you do. What's your point?"